tips for dealing with Australian customs

I passed through many customs, immigration and security checks at various Australian airports in the last three weeks.

Each airport has its own variant on a dire warning that reads:

'Flippant, amusing or sarcastic remarks will not be tolerated. Offenders may be subject to a $500,000 fine and/or 10 years in jail'.

Of course, we didn't tell Norman Junior III that. My - how we all laughed when he followed our advice and proudly (and loudly) announced to the customs official at Brisbane airport.

'I have nothing to declare but my genius.'